Have you ever been waiting at say, the doctor’s office or hair salon, and suddenly find yourself wanting to commit a crime? Me – all the time. Not by causing a scene of destruction because I’ve been waiting for over 10 minutes so WHAT IS THE HOLD UP?? kind of crime. No, I mean stealing; as in, ‘Ooh, the recipe in this magazine must come home with me for I will try it and it will be the best thing I’ve ever created’. Okay, it’s not the crime of the century but who hasn’t secretly wanted to deface a magazine in a waiting room, hmm???
However, I am a grown-up now and therefore a responsible part of this society. I set a good example for the rest of the world and don’t give in to such urges anymore. But three years ago – well, let’s just say I was at a bad place in my life. I gave in to the seductive temptation of a recipe from a certain celebrity who shall remain nameless, though I don’t think it would hurt to give you a hint because we’re friends – (okay, you broke me – it’s Tiffani-Amber Thiessen)
This girl still looked amazing, even though her Saved by the Bell years were long behind her. And according to Tiffani, her Cinnamon Oatcakes would make me smile because of the oats’ B-Vitamin trigger production of serotonin AND keep me feeling full for a super long time. You can see why I caved and gave in to the temptation, right? Happy and Full? Sold!
In my defense, the magazine was older than the hills and had already been ripped apart in so many sections, I seriously doubted if anyone would ever have known it was there in the first place. At least that’s what I tell myself so I can sleep at night.
I did the dirty deed and quietly ripped out the bottom left side of the magazine, making sure to cough with each tear of the paper so no one would notice (does that even work?) and tucked the tattered edged recipe with Tiffani’s smiling face into my purse.
And then forgot all about it.
For a really, really long time.
In fact, I came across it just the other day and thought, ‘oh, yeah…..’ and knew that I had to try it for Craig since he was on vacation. Really, I should be saying that I tried it ‘on’ Craig. I would have eaten it myself, but I’m used to eating things that normal people wouldn’t touch with a 10 foot pole, so I figured he’d be a better judge. Here is the famous recipe that I broke the law to get:
- 2 cups rolled oats
- 4 egg whites
- 1/1 teaspoon cinnamon
- Vegetable oil cooking spray
- 1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
- 1/2 cup sliced strawberries
Mix first three ingredients together in a bowl. Then create 4 individual oat ‘patties’ and place them onto a skillet lightly dusted with cooking spray. Cook for 10 minutes, turning once. Transfer to a plate and top with applesauce and strawberries. Serves 2
Total calories per serving: 454 calories, 7 grams of fat, 75 grams of carbs, 12 grams of fiber and 22 grams of protein.
Here is how mine turned out, minus the strawberries because we didn’t have any. I did however, add cinnamon to the top of the applesauce.
You wouldn’t think that 4 egg whites would be enough to keep a bunch of rolled oats together, but oddly enough, they did – in fact, they stuck like glue. I placed Craig’s serving in front of him and watched as he bit into his first piece all the while eyeing me oddly before finally asking, ‘Why aren’t you having any?’ Silly Craig. He already knew the answer to that. “Because,” I said. “I don’t trust myself to contribute an unbiased, objective opinion when all I can think about is the need to tweak that recipe with brown sugar, raisins and flour and turn the whole thing into one big giant oatmeal cookie.”
Satisfied with that answer, he dug in, as I ate a bowl of regular oatmeal and some Fage yogurt with granola. Half way through breakfast I could tell something wasn’t quite right. He left the table and headed into the kitchen, bringing back a single serve of applesauce and plopped it onto the remaining oatcakes. I was going to ask how it was but since he kept eating, I thought it was best to just keep my mouth shut.
When breakfast was over and we stacked our dishes, I couldn’t resist any longer. “So……how were they?” I asked.
“You can tell your readers that they were a little dry,” he said with a raspy voice while reaching for more coffee. “I’m sure they’ll keep me full for a while, but they have a dry, chewy texture to them that I just couldn’t get past.”
“Then why did you finish them?” I asked. He replied with the same answer he always gives when I try out recipes that scream Epic Fail: “If I didn’t make it, I have no right to complain about it. They weren’t inedible, just not……good, that’s all.” He was right. I snuck in a few bites while he was rooting around the cupboards and they were rubbery. Aside from the applesauce they were practically tasteless.
If you’ve tried this recipe or are one of those few miraculous folks that can make the best food out of a nearly empty kitchen, I welcome you to try and liven up this recipe without adding too many calories and let me know if there is a way to improve upon them. If not, it’s back to oatmeal in a bowl; not that there’s anything wrong with that.