Fat Girl Wearing Thin

Life beyond the loss.

   May 24

Gratitude Photos of the Week

I thought I’d check in one last time this week, as I likely won’t be posting again until after Craig’s surgery is over (look for me around Wednesday of next week).

Things are status quo over here.  Craig is still making do with protein shakes and low-sodium, clear based soups.  He’s starting to have more bad days than good, though.  Whatever is happening inside his abdomen is now keeping him home 24/7.  Amazingly, his attitude is still good.  I don’t know how he maintains such a positive spirit after 5 weeks but that’s my husband. 

I am keeping on track with my eating – as in for now, not eating massive amounts of the things I used to reach for in times of stress and strain.  I don’t know how I can crave sugary comfort foods with this giant knot in my stomach that seems to be growing heavier with each passing day; I think it’s old reflexes coming back to haunt me.  The important thing is, I’m not giving into it. 

I haven’t posted Gratitude photos in a couple of weeks, so today you get two:


The first of my poppies are blooming.  I have tried, unsuccessfully mind you, to grow these beauties for years because the rabbits always plucked the buds just before they opened.  Someone at my local plant store gave me the suggestion of spreading blood meal in my flowerbed to keep out rabbits because they don’t like the smell.  It is apparently working because here they are – and I am very grateful.  These are my absolute favorite flowers and whenever I see them I just want to grab my paintbrush and lay them to canvas. 

Speaking of painting, I am extremely grateful for that right now.  It has helped keep my mind occupied and focused, these last couple of weeks especially.  While Craig is napping during the day or if I can’t sleep at night I slip into my studio and just…paint.  These ‘doodle-birds’ have been occupying my time  because I can easily stop at any time and just pick up where I left off without any problem.  Here’s my latest, which I have pretty much dedicated to fellow blogger Didi since she suggested an American Kestrel ages ago:

Several people have asked if I would be making prints of these.  Even though I hadn’t intended on it, I decided to do a limited run and see if the interest is there.  I’d like to get a few more finished first, and hopefully will have some time to work on them while Craig is recovering. 

Have a good weekend.  I hope to be back here sometime next week with good news. 


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  1. vickie says:

    So very glad you posted. Was wondering about you. Are you listening to music or audible books to occupy your mind? Or are you able to keep your mind clear as you paint?

    We planted 500 tulips one year and the squirrels ate them all. Every single one and then left holes all over the beds. I had put bone meal, human hair AND cayenne pepper in all the holes. Maybe I would have been better with blood meal, but I doubt it.

    We planted seeds (annuals) this year but are not holding our breath, because just as you wrote, the bunnies mow things down very aggressively. Each time you pull into a driveway, at least one bunny is visible. I can’t imagine how many live here.

    My grandmother had a huge bed of poppies. I drove back to her farm (deserted) several years ago with a shovel when I was in that area to see if they were still there, but there was no sign of them, very tall weeds in their place. I would love to have had hers.

    • Ellen says:

      Painting has always been a good thing for me. I hadn’t realized just how much until recently. Audiobooks are usually on to help me fall asleep at night, though :)
      500 tulips all eaten by squirrels? Planting takes WORK. I would be so mad!
      I hope my poppies continue to grow. I’ve always wanted to do a series of paintings featuring poppies but was determined to wait until I could paint them from my own yard.

  2. NewMe says:

    Yes, please do let us know when the doodle-birds will be ready. Your fans await them!

    And we’re all waiting to hear how things go next week.

    {{{{{many, many hugs}}}}}

  3. didi says:

    Glad you did a kestrel. He’s got a nice tribal vibe going on. :)
    Rabbits aren’t the only ones that don’t like the smell of blood meal. Eesh. A whiff of that stuff turns my stomach.

    If you haven’t noticed I am catching up on my blog reading today. My old blog is now private, because some folks stumbled upon it that I’d rather not have reading some of the posts. I started up a new blog (http://bitsofstringandsealingwax.blogspot.com/), and am going to start posting all family/friend appropriate stuff.

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