Last week’s exercise had us choosing a part of ourselves to take special care of for one week. How many of you knew right away which area you’d been neglecting and were going to tend to? I’ll admit, I knew immediately what area I’ve been neglecting and to be even more honest: this exercise, for me, was pretty difficult. In fact, I had to force myself to do it. Read on for my update….
A Piece of Me.
Spend the week tending to a part of the remarkable body that serves you. Beginning today, choose a part of your body that you’ve been dismissing or have been neglectful of and pay special attention to that area for the next week by nurturing it every day.
The part I chose to pay special attention to was an area on my stomach. Specifically, the scar that stretches from one side of my abdomen to the other – the permanent reminder of my abdominal hysterectomy last year.
After arriving home from the hospital last June there wasn’t much I could do with my belly other than keep watch over my incision and make sure it didn’t get infected. It’s been over 7 months since surgery and even though my incision has healed, it’s unfortunately turning into a keloid scar. For those of you who aren’t familiar with that term, it’s basically an excess growth of scar tissue, so instead of having a smooth, flat line where my incision was, it is raised and rigid. As a result, I find myself avoiding my stomach in general at all costs. The whole thing looks like a major train wreck. It’s unsightly and makes me feel less attractive. I still have major swelling in my belly on days when I run. My clothes still don’t fit properly and maybe, never will again. Neglected body part? Um – yes, and I really don’t want to feel this way about myself.
So, what does a girl do with an area that brings about so many negative emotions? I had to think about that for a bit. First, I knew that I needed to become more comfortable with my scar in general, because let’s face it, it’s a part of me ~ like it or not. So, I started my week by forcing myself (I hate to use that word but yes, I literally had to force myself) to actually look at it every day. I also forced myself to trace the scraggled line with my finger, again every day, in an attempt to desensitize myself from it. Finally, I began massaging Vitamin E oil into my scar, which I bought a long time ago but never used because I simply wasn’t ready to ‘deal with it’.
My thoughts now that I’ve been attending to my scar for a full week:
I wish I could say that I was confident and feeling most comfortable with my belly and more at peace with my scar, but I’d be lying. Rome wasn’t built in a day after all, and my attitude over the whole thing is simply going to take more effort on my part. The difference though, is that now I’m actually willing to work on it instead of ignore it. This week has shown me that I need to develop more compassion for my body as a whole and what it’s been through instead of what it looks like. It is healing the only way it knows how and I just need to be more understanding to that fact.
How did you do?
Which piece of you did you choose, and why that particular area? Did you feel more compassion for your body and/or less critical of it while doing this exercise? Did you have to remind yourself not to rush through your general care routine, or did it help you slow down and become more attentive to your body’s needs? Did it improve your overall attitude about yourself? Please feel free to add anything you like to this discussion, either in the comments section below or on your own blog – just make sure to link to your post from here so we can all visit you!
Thanks for participating this week, everyone. Drop by tomorrow for some topics to think about for our next exercise. Have a good session.